The tiktok train about the man who solves... 😏

International Women's Day! 🗓️✨

Author

Anama Gómez
March 06, 2024 

March 8th is two days away so I want to bring you a reflection on the recent trend on TikTok suggesting that women seek a man who 'solves'(#Hombrequeresuelve) meaning, who finds solutions, offers help to all our problems. This is an example of how gender stereotypes continue to perpetuate inequality. I'm not saying it isn't valuable to have a partner who facilitates, listens, understands, and wants to be part of our well-being, because of course, we all want it or I speak for myself, I want someone like that!

The real man who solves for Carrie has a name: #ManoloBlahnik 🩰🥰💎

I grew up in a conventional family, where my father's role was to provide and 'solve' But solving looked different in many other ways because my mother's role was essential in maintaining the home as best as possible. I grew up understanding that instead of seeking someone to 'solve' us, we should seek relationships based on equality, mutual respect, and mutual support. This means recognizing and valuing our own strengths and abilities, as well as those of our partners, and working together as equal partners in life and in love.

What if girls and women always thought with conviction: 'I am capable' without hesitation, without doubts, transcending the annoying impostor syndrome and without questioning our abilities? That is an incredible act of rebellion in which many of us are now speaking out.

To break these paradigms, it is crucial that we ourselves challenge these limiting notions and foster confidence in ourselves and in our abilities in the same way we do for other women around us.

My invitation is not only to believe that we are capable, but also to ensure that we are recognizing the capabilities of others women. It is not enough to trust in ourselves; let us be that path, that door, or that light to make the road a little easier for other women.

TRY THIS OUT

As a commemoration of International Women's Day, here are some questions that can help you reflect on whether you have experienced or perpetrated gender-based violence in your everyday life.

🐼 Have I been subjected to humiliating comments, constant criticism, or mockery about my appearance, intelligence, or abilities?

🐼Have I been pressured or forced to do something sexually that I did not want to do?

🐼Have I experienced excessive control over my life, such as the constant need to report on my actions or the prohibition of seeing friends and family?

🐼Have I been a victim of threats, insults, or verbal or physical aggression?

🐼Have I felt that my opinions, desires, or needs are not valued or taken into account in a relationship?

🐼Have I been deliberately excluded from important decisions affecting my life?

🐼Have I been subjected to emotional manipulation or blackmail to get what my partner or someone else wants?

🐼Have I been deprived of access to financial or economic resources by my partner or someone else?

🐼Have I felt that I am in physical or emotional danger due to the behavior of my partner or someone close?

Anama Gómez 🌙